Sunday, 3 June 2007

'Retard who cough': The utter pointlessness of spam

'For retard who cough' is the title of a gobbet of spam that flew into my inbox today. Ok..ay, I think, an advert for a generic drug.

But this is followed by a mangled paragraph from Jane Austen's Emma:

And the bell was rung, and the carriages spoken for. A few minutes mor "Why, pretty well; but not quite well. Poor Perry is bilious, and he h "Oh! papa, we have missed seeing them but one entire day since they ma She had not time to know how Mr. Elton took the reproof, so rapidly di "Emma never thinks of herself, if she can do good to others," rejoined The charming Augusta Hawkins, in addition to all the usual advantages "That is as formidable an image as you could present, Harriet; and if "Well, and that is as early as most men can afford to marry, who are n

And then a few more lines of gobbledygook:

Here is one hot new s to ck with lots of exciting news and what seems to be a bright future!

Strategy X Inc. (SGXI)
A global risk mitigation specialist corporation.

Price Today: 0.009
Recommendation: Buy aggresively (500+% pump expected)

SGXI news:
Strategy X Outlines Vertical Market Pursuit of the
2007 U.S. Department of Homeland Security Grants...

For the complete release, please see your brokers website.


No link to my broker's website; no URL I can click on to buy cough mixture for retard. Not even the remotest hint of how I can take advantage of the 500+% pump.

Not. A. Sausage.

Now I know I'm probably wasting bandwidth by complaining about this scourge, and I rarely read the 10-odd emails a day that slither past my spam filters, but this one caught my eye. What's the point of an email like this? Why bother at all? If you're going to use a bit of literature to catch the eye of your victim, why choose something from Emma? Wouldn't a snippet from The Da Vinci Code, say, or even the Bible, be a better bet?

Please enlighten me.

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